Thursday, February 7, 2008

I ask this favor of you.

I work a couple nights a week at a certain lingerie store in the mall for fun. I've worked there for a long time and in that time I've experienced many things that I'd really rather never had experienced. These things must stop so that this job may remain fun.

From time to time, the company mails out coupons for discounts on bras and free panties. The free panties that are usually offered are our basic panties in the basic solid colors. You people that get all worked up that you can't get the exact style or fancy pattern that you wanted are driving me nuts! Its a FREE panty! This is not something you are entitled to, this is something that the company offered to you as a customer. You do not have a right to yell at me and degrade me for offering you EXACTLY what is printed on the coupon. Stop complaining about free stuff!

I am fully aware that I work at a lingerie store and part of my job is to make sure that the bras you are purchasing are fitting you correctly. When I'm manning the fitting rooms, I do go into rooms and see women in their bras to check the fit. However, I do not find it appropriate for you to try on the peek-a-boo bras and camisoles then proceed to leave your room to seek me out to see how it looks on you. I have no desire to see you in lingerie at all, let alone see your nipples poking out in the peek-a-boo space. Stop it. Bring your best girlfriend along to help you shop if you're not sure how things look on you all by yourself.

Speaking of fitting rooms, have you ever heard of the "swimsuit rule"? If you absolutely must try on the underwear before you buy it, please try them on OVER your own underwear, just like you do with swimwear. I thought this was common sense. I thought wrong. You women that try on the garments and leave behind mystery stains disgust me. I do not want to have to go in a pick up that stained thong off the fitting room floor after you so rudely discarded it there.

I do not have children so I cannot fully understand how hard they must be to keep under control. However, if you can't stop your children from wheeling along at full speed through my store on those stupid little heelies then take them away. Seems simple enough. It is absolutely not okay for those children to be treating the mall as a roller skating rink. Guess what, there are entire business dedicated for just that sort of thing. If you're having trouble locating a spot for that activity, contact me, I can help.

Working at this store has made me realize why some establishments do not allow you to bring food and drink inside. Most people are perfectly capable of bringing a smoothie or a pretzel in with them while they browse the store and not make a mess. There are the exceptions of course. Thank you for leaving your corn dog on top of the makeup when you decided you no longer wanted it. Thank you for putting your now cold coffee on top of the panty table. Don't worry about that garbage can that was 4 feet away from you, I would love to pick up after you. Also, the people that let they're kids eat while they are shopping must desist immediately. Sweeping up your kid's crushed Nilla Wafers or chocolate muffin off the vast marble floor is just what I needed to wrap up my night.

One of the duties as an employee on the floor there is to keep the panties on top of the table straight. I don't mind it so much. Its not a hard task. I do however mind when you look me in the eye, see me straightening said panties and then proceed to tear my nights hard work apart right in front of my face. Don't mind the fact that I offered to help you find your size in the drawers. I love staying all night re-straightening.

I don't know about you, but if I'm somewhere and the places closes, I leave. When we shut off the music, that should be your first clue that maybe you should hurry and make your purchase. When you're suddenly outnumbered by employees 6 to 1, that should also clue you in to hurry up and make your purchase. Do not proceed to continue browsing and trying things on until we've been closed for half an hour. It is not a good thing when mall security has to come force us to get you out and close the store so that they can lock the mall down. The longer you stay at our store, the longer we all have to stay. You're keeping us from sleep, homework and our families. Be courteous.

Men shopping at this store usually makes for a pretty interesting experience. I understand most of you probably have no idea where to start when you go in there, but we need to lay down some ground rules. Its is absolutely not okay for you to size me up and compare me to your girlfriend/wife. Its rude and it makes me uncomfortable. It is also not okay to ask me to try on the lingerie for you because I am "pretty close to her size". You creep. If you're unsure of her size, guess. The stuff can be exchanged. Please refrain from gawking and drooling over the mannequins and the poster of the models. I don't want to see that. If you must, get the catalog and do it in the privacy of your own home.

I know this is a lot of complaints about my "fun" job, but trust me. Even though this list is long, the list of good out weighs the bad. Therefore I stay. However, if you could please help me out by not doing the aforementioned things, I would be ever so grateful.

Thank you,
Your fed up lingerie employee.

98 comments:

The Wallenbergs said...

Well said girl!

Wendy said...

Ads, I love you so much! This post was awesome. The past several times I tried to get on your blog, the page kept redirecting and being weird so I'm so glad I can read it now! I especially loved that I just got the free panty card this week. :)

Tiffany said...

I also worked for a certain lingerie store. I totally felt the same way! It's free people. Beggars can't be choosers.

WheresMyAngels said...

Oh I bet that is a fun job, except for folding the underwear, I can't do my own big mamma underwear, let alone some pink lace thong.

Great humorous post!

Givinya De Elba said...

Wow, I can't believe people are so rude! I'd like the whole world to read this so people would be nicer to our shop assistants!

Tara@From Dawn Till Rusk said...

Grrross! If people are like that in a store, you've got to wonder what are they like at home?

4 under 4 said...

Retail can be nasty, I am not sure I could do it again, kudos to you!!!!

Congrats on your SITS recognition! I will be back!!!!

Outnumbered2to1 said...

Nasty about the women who try the stuff on. That is why I do mail order from said store.

Heather said...

Hey there SITSta! I cannot believe that any man would actually think it was okay to ask an employee to try something on - *shudder* the nerve!

The world of retail, LOL!

Jenkins said...

Hello from SITS.
I cannot even imagine the horror of finding "gifts" left behind. And the creepy men, no thanks.
I worked in a shoe store during college, thought getting discounts on shoes would be great...not so much. The smell and condition of some people feet was too much to handle. Of course those were the people who wanted you to put the shoes on their feet. But I must say that does not compare to cleaning up "used" undies. Oh my!

Jaci said...

HAHA! Very funny. Picking up tried on thongs off the floor must be disgusting. I worked in lingerie at a department store, and I had to bra fit all kinds of weird women. I understand. :(

Christmas was the worst for creepy lingerie guys...

wendy said...

And these are just SOME of the many reasons I do not work in retail!

Congrats on being featured, SITSta!

Angela said...

Oh, I can't imagine what you see!

I always feel embarrassed going in for my free panty! :)

Chandra Stauffer said...

First of all, I love the name of your blog.

And secondly, I always throw away my free panty coupon because I always imagine how much the employees hate it.

Because, I think too much too. :)

Hot Tub Lizzy said...

1 - Happy SITSday!!

2 - I HATE heelies... HATE HATE HATE THEM

3 - Thanks for the morning chuckle!

ugagirl30 said...

Oh, the lovely things that transpire in retail. When I did it, it was also a love/hate relationship. I loved the job and hated most of the people.

Jen said...

To funny. I can't believe that men as you to try stuff on for them, perverts! And I can't believe that people actually come out of the dressing room with lingerie on and ask you if it fits. You could not get me out of the dressing room with lingerie on if you paid me, needless to say I don't where it very often.
What an interesting job.

Caroline said...

Maybe we should team up and write a letter to the owner of all heelies. They are so obnoxious and I've been just about beaned from behind by many a wheeling tween with those darned shoes.

Kat said...

Congrats on your SITS day! It is so fun to be in the spotlight.

As a mom with two kiddos...you'll be happy to know that I refuse to buy them Heelies. It drives me nuts to see kids just about anywhere in them.

I worked retail in high school. In the Macy's kids department. My biggest issues was people coming in to buy clothing gifts. And they didn't know what size. So they'd tell me they needed an outfit for a 4 year old. Because all four year olds are the same size, right? Right?

At Home Redesigns said...

Retail is way too hard! I've gained a new appreciation for it tho. Thanks!

Rene said...

Congrats on your SITS girl status today!! I'm off to read your other posts but if they're as funny as this, I'm lovin' you already!

ps...my DH consistently bugged me about going into one of the lingerie stores and I always pushed him off it. Finally I got sick of it and told him ok, let's go bucko! He was thoroughly embarassed in there and I highly doubt he will ever step foot in one again. My job is done here!

Summer said...

I am so amazed at the lack of common courtesy too many individuals have nowadays.

lemonologie said...

Congrats on SITS!

I think it all boils down to respect. It's sad, but people just don't have that anymore.

And Baby Will Make 4 said...

The only people that get your pain are those that have worked retail before. Friends will find it strange when it's closing time and I am trying to rush them out or straightening after them and I don't even work in the store.

I did the Gap for many years and there is nothing more horrid than knowing you have to stay late to clean, etc. and having Jo Slow come in 1 minute before closing not knowing what she wants.

Kudos to you for sticking it out, because even part-time is a killer!

Jill said...

AH the joys of retail! Sometimes I miss it, and then I read things like this post and remember why I left. It's amazing how gross people can be, isn't it?


Here from SITS :)

Deanna said...

Came over from SITS! This is a great post! Can't wait to read more!

Mrs. S said...

Found you on SITS. I hope you enjoy your day in the sun because I really enjoyed reading your posts. I'll be back.


And I agree with the underwear/swimwear part. Gross.

Half-Past Kissin' Time said...

Great post! FUnny and practical (for those of us who are STUPID; surely no SITS girls, though!) I would also recommend a site called Getinherhead.com It's a "wishlist" site on which women can leave specifics (like sizes) of anything they wish their husband would buy for them. I used it and was thrilled that Hubby actually consulted it!

Kacey Randolph said...

This made me LOL all the way through. I firmly believe that if everyone worked retail for at least 3 months we would all have a lot more respect for each other! I always return clothes that I try on making sure to put them back on the hanger exactly how they were orginally, just like I always clean off the table when we eat out and stack the plates. It's just the nice thing to do...and I may think a little too much. Glad to have read your blog this morning!

Kimberly said...

Congrats on being featured today!
This makes me laugh...a lot!
I can only imagine how obnoxious people can be...especially the customer kind of people! :)

trashalou said...

Hey? When you become Queen of The World and have dominion over everything, will you promise to reember us small folk from way back in your blogging days? Because you know we will vote for you to have that job.

The File Family said...

Congrats on the feature!

Great post :)

Jen said...

I'm visiting from SITS and this post is seriously hilarious! Keep up the good work!

Memarie Lane said...

I would never take my kids into a lingerie store. Why on earth would anyone do that???

I can understand trying on underwear over underwear, but trying on a bra over a bra can't possibly give you an accurate idea of fit, can it? Especially not on a very well endowed woman like myself that needs to ensure proper support and such.

sassy stephanie said...

I always feel so bad in stores with lots of things folded. I never want to touch too many things b/c I can't imagine the time it takes to straighten it all up, just to get messed up again.

Men wandering nervously through this store crack me up. When they are there with their "wo-man", they always look like they are trying to be invisible, like they are the only man that has ever walked through the doors!

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

I worked in the mall for years...so I say bravo...to all of it...

Stephanie said...

Thank goodness I have never done any of these things or I'd feel bad!!!!

Melanie said...

I love how people feel entitled nowadays. It is quite ridiculous. What happen to being appreciative and understanding of other people.

Karen said...

Men actually ask youto try stuff on...yuk!! Creepy perverts.

As a young girl,I worked, for a short while, in a clothing store in NZ, that sold lingerie as well as outer clothing. Was a real eye opener into human behaviour!

Crazy Momma said...

Hysterical and so true!

Retail jobs are my favorite (well aside from the one I have now) but people are SO oblivious!

Ann said...

Found you via SITS!
Good writing!
Part of my life story has a work stint at a lingerie department and the stories we have in common make me laugh!
Like this one time...
Oh... you know all about this stuff.
Have fun! And try to remember it all. It could make for a great book!

~*Paty*~ said...

Ugh...I don't think I'll ever buy another pair of underwear! Haha. I've worked in retail...not lingerie, but I know what you mean on some issues.

The Blaisdell Family said...

Found you on SITS. What a funny post!! I honestly believe all these rude and stupid people have NEVER worked retail before. Having worked in retail I know first hand that there are a lot of lazy, thoughtless, dumb in the head people out there! Honestly, if this is what they do at a store...what does their house look like?? YIKES!!

Trying on panties without wearing your own...sick, sick, and sick!!!

Me said...

Eww! This is why I do all my lingerie shopping online.

Sonya said...

Congrats on SITS!!! You are saucy by the way.....how fun to work in an undie shop!!! I bet you have the best undie drawer! But I am with you....sometimes working retail, no matter how fun, causes some gripes here and there! :)

Enjoy your SITSahood Day!

Missy said...

I'm speechless! Stained thongs? Staying after the store closes? How do these people sleep at night?
I worked at the Limited for-ev-er and to console ourselves on late nights we'd say "well, at least we don't work somewhere that has an underwear table to straighten."
I'm so paranoid about courtesy in stores that now I won't even go in 30 min prior to closing!

Camille; Ponytail Challenge said...

Eeewwww....so gross- the stains. I am going to think of things differently the next time I rummage the underewear table- and push my stroller through the store- really? No Nilla Wafers? I'll have to find something non-crumbling!
I can't believe people actually do all of those things.

Kristen said...

Found you on SITS
Eww ewww ewwwwwwwww!!!!!!
LMAO

Gina said...

Oh no!! My husband is one of those "well, I think she's about your size" men. but he has NEVER asked an employee to try something on!!! that's weird!!!
I'll make sure he stops that immediately (the sizing up part).
He knows the basic rule these days is "small". he's usually safe if he just sticks with that.

Christie said...

Thanks for the laugh...it's always good to find humor in your job, right?
Congrats on being a SITS girl today!

Swirl Girl said...

The absolute worst part about working in the public sector is...the public!

For some reason - people forget common courtesy when they leave their homes.

What am I saying? That would mean that they had it in the first place.

www.swirlgirlspearls.blogspot.com

Jaime H. said...

I can't believe people actually do that!

And I'll try and keep my kids' mess off the floor. :) I'm pretty good about it, and if a huge mess is made, I'll clean it up the best I can.

I have friends who work in a lingerie store, too. They never mentioned the horrors!!

Congrats on being SITS featured!

Tracy P. said...

Happy SITS Day! Whew, I'm not cut out for your job, that's for sure. I've got the creeps just reading it. But well put--I hope they read and cooperate!

Cara Starr said...

Now see, i actually NEED a real fitting because i know i've got it all wrong. But i am MORTIFIED at the thought of the salesgirl seeing me in a bra. The idea that people start whipping out nipples is appalling.

Karol said...

Amen sister! I definitely don't envy you, but I completely understand with 8 years of serving experience under my belt!

*congrats on your SITS featured blogger!

jyll said...

Nothing surprises me when it comes to the general public! Congrats on your Sitsa spot!

Jenni said...

All I have to say is Ewww. After all those years I bet you have a ton of interesting stories. . .but I am not sure I'd like to hear them, come to think of it!

Maternal Mirth said...

I have to say I am not guilty of any of that, but I never seem to cash in on the free stuff before it expires :(

Busy lady, I am.

Ronnica said...

The guys sizing you up or asking you to try on things is creepy. Ick.

Love the layout of your blog!

Creative Junkie said...

Although I have never worked in your particular store, I've had my own share of retail hell and omg, I can so relate to SO MUCH of what you posted.

And can I just say, I would sooner rip out my own eyeballs than step one centimeter out of a dressing room with nothing but lingerie on. I wouldn't want to inflict that kind of pain on anyone.

EmBee said...

Okay, the trying on of panties 'commando style'.... EEEEewwwwwwww!
What do you do with them? Trash, I hope!

Stephanie said...

I think every job that deals with customers has a similar list of complaints and requests that should be common sense. It's interesting to read the point of view from someone who works at a lingerie store!

Peggy said...

This is funny but I feel your pain! It amazes me how inconsiderate people can be.

Lisa@BlessedwithGrace said...

Oh girl, this is hysterical and SAD! It is hard to believe that some people are that stupid and inconsiderate...but they ARE! Thanks for sharing. We can always use a good laugh.

Jen Edwards said...

Hi, I totally know where you are comming from, I have even had people who have come up to my booth (I sell my paintings at local shows)and pick up one of my works and ask "Can I have this?"

At least they asked!
Jen

Jennifer P. said...

That. was. hilarious. ! I worked mall retail when I was about your age and can relate to everything--especially the folding part. I still to this day (11 years later) HATE folding! And I"m always so careful to look nicely at the store so as not to mess up some poor girl's hard work. Here's the kicker though--the store I worked at had stuff for everyone, but seemed to really attract senior citizens. Imagine helping OLD PEOPLE in the dressing room with their bras. ***Shudder***

Hairline Fracture said...

Some people are just wrong! It had never occurred to me that you might have to put up with some of that awful behavior. Hang in there!

Karla @ Ramblin' Roads said...

Great post! I'm mostly too shy to shop at your store... but I'll be very careful to mind my manners when I do!

Jessica said...

yes I agree gross. Sorry your job is like that.

DysFUNctional Mom said...

It makes me wonder how people got through life without learning ANY sense of what is acceptable and what is not. Freaky!

Amy said...

Hello from a fellow SITSta! I love your store, (I know where you work, I live for those free panties :P) I've also worked with the public before, and it sucks, people are nasty sometimes.

Melissa Lester said...

I guess you do have lots of stories to tell working there! I can't believe people would try on panties in the store. Ick! That makes me want to order them from VS online instead of taking a risk buying them in the store.

Insta-mom said...

I haven't worked in lingerie, but women's clothing isn't much different. No, I don't want to stand in the fitting room with you while you strip and try on the dress that you can't zip yourself because you don't want to walk out of the room with an unzipped dress. Always.bring.a.friend.

Happy SITS day!

Mama Dawg said...

Oh, you poor thing. I would hate to work in any establishment where I would even have a remote chance of accidentally seeing another woman's breast. It's bad enough having my own to look at post-baby...to see a strangers...no thank you.

came via SITS

mrsbear0309 said...

There must be some pretty awesome perks at this mall job, I would've run out screaming at the first sight of nipple or eek! mysterious panty stain.

Perez Family Spot said...

If it's V.S. you are talking about, I KNOW your pain! I loved the 40% discount and breaks at the food court, but was not liking staying till 3 am during Christmas and Semi-Annual sales. Folding things you know people will destroy is frustration. I still fold stuff after I try it on, no matter where I shop.

SBelle said...

Congratulations on SITS. You are one patient gal...that's an important "belle" quality, southern or otherwise.

Kaza said...

Hey SITSta! Nice post, much needed! Enjoy your day of comment love!

Simply Stork said...

oh what goes unsaid...ewwww...makes me wonder what else goes on in those dressing rooms...note to self...must wash everything...darn it all...wash it twice :o)

~simply~

ragdoll said...

Congrats on your SITS day. I didn't work in an all-lingerie, but I did work in an upscale dress shop, and I was shocked with what we had to put up with. I saw nothing that was funny nor laughable. More like pitiful as the women you have portrayed here.

Nice post

Mamasphere said...

One of the best days of my life was my last day at my retail job. I got to tell people exactly what I thought! Well, not everything I thought, lol. But enough to make me feel better.

Z's Mom said...

Yeah, I miss commen sense....well said!

Adiel said...

See my responses at the following post:
http://triplyksis.blogspot.com/2008/07/revisiting-i-ask-this-favor-of-you.html

Michelle said...

I'm sorry, but seriously? People try on underwear and leave STAINS in it and then DON'T buy it? What is wrong with people?

I may never be able to buy underwear again after reading this. When I die, it won't be in a decent clean pair as my mother always exhorted me but instead in a pair that has no elastic anymore, is faded and tattered and really can't be called underwear anymore but more undersortofcovering.

ewwwwww.

lynn said...

Dropped in from SITS. Great post! I've worked in retail most of my adult life and it's amazing how rude and disgusting people can be.

Angela said...

Oh, how I feel your pain! I do not work in retail, but I am generally just astounded as I go through life at how rude people can be. Just plain discourteous! I hope you have a great day being featured on SITS! I was featured on the Saucy Eats page today, and I'm loving it!

Laurel said...

So sorry for the nightie nightmares at work! I hate it when men are in the lingerie store. Way up on the ick factor.

I'll never look at what I thought were clean unders again. Yuck!

Linney Shvede said...

congrats on your SITS day! wow! what a job!

Amy said...

That is too funny. I had NO clue..and yes, that would be MY children skating thru your store! We just made a rule that they cant wear them in public after a child almost mowed down my 2 year old. YUCK about the panties-did their moms teach them NOTHING?!

Kris said...

Here from SITS - I've worked in a mall clothing store when I was your age so I can totally relate to a lot of this. And it is why I avoid taking my 3 kids into certain mall stores, since I would be the one leaving behind nilla wafer crumbs etc.

Rhea said...

I would NOT take my boys bra and panty shopping with me, that's for sure. lol

I bet you have some wonderful stories, and the stains are totally gross.

I had a friend who worked in a swimwear store for a while, and she had some NIGHTMARE stories to share.

Ashley said...

Oh my, those things you mentioned would NOT be fun to deal with. :(

AFRo said...

I'm late as usual to the party. Sorry. But, I'm jumping over from SITS and I need to know... please tell me that you throw away the panties that have mysterious stains. Not that I would ever purchase said panties, but if I did, I would be highly upset and would want at least a pair of free panties in return. Free panties of my choosing.

Mama's Losin' It said...

Woo hoo!! Look at you and all this comment love! Isn't it great!?! Just bask in it...I know I'ma day late...but still. Live it up girlfriend!

Judy Haley said...

tell it like it is!

Rph Mommy said...

This is hilarious. People really try on underwear? Wow. I always thought either your a large or an extra-large. Hmmm, silly me.

StitchinByTheLake said...

My grandchildren have those tennis shoes with wheels. What is that about? They are too lazy to walk? And I agree with the above commenter - people try on underwear? Blessings, marlene

Kristinia - Loving Heart Mommy said...

Found you from SITS, I love your post! I know exactly how you feel from working in another type of retail store! Very well written and very to the point, now if we could make these into posters and post them at our work stations, think anyone would care? Probably not but it would be how we feel!